Friday, 18 January 2013

Allman & Woman - Two The Hard Way (1977)

And they said it wouldn't last!



If Cher wasn't giving up on the singing malarkey, she certainly wasn't giving up her heroine-addicted husband, so why not combine her to biggest pleasures? Fortunately, love is the only drug here. Cher's 1979 disco albums were hardly the bold new direction no one saw coming. There were definite stepping stones in this direction: The Cher Show in '75 showcased the genre, particularly on a duet where Cher makes a compelling attempt to hold her own alongside Patti Labelle; and her solo covers of Rescue Me had a brisk dance pace and Knock On Wood illustrated a knack to soak up a wide array of influences, but still maintain her unique identity. One musical oeuvre that hinted at what was to come with her Cassablanca years is her rather baffling attempt to have another go at the husband and wife duo thing with her spouse of 4 years Gregg Allman. The album is also the last thread of the singer's tender soft-rock balladry, and what a discreet bow it is. Despite not charting and an outpouring of dismal reviews, Two The Hard Way has reportedly sold 500,000 copies worldwide.
Fingers crossed!

The cover You've Really Got A Hold On Me is a faithful one whether their relationship was or not. Like themselves, I'm a bit split on this one. Going together like cheese and a grater, their vocals sound decent if unspectacular on I Found You, Love. Cher let's loose a bit and the faceless discotheque grooves make me think of the classic films The Bitch and The Stud (how ironic). Move Me sounds like a lesser Heaven Must be Missing An Angel. Love's rueful strain is felt on Can You Fool, a sweet ballad resting on glimmering keyboards and country inflection. The corn is cranked high, but if you can get past it, the track is nice enough (her falsetto also makes a cameo). Proving everyone wrong, We're Gonna Make It was fighting a losing battle in more sense than one. The track itself has an engaging strut should one be that way inclined, and there's some emphatic hollering to no melody in particular. "I love you better than your own kid did" is Cher's proud boast on Do What You Gotta Do, one of the album's highlights. Sensual MOR slump In For The Night is more of those two blowing their own trumpet, with plenty of sax on the horizon if nothing else. Blowing his wad first, Shadow Dream Song is Greg's solo song. Cher's number, Islands, is a nice enough after-hours ballad. The voice is getting very masculine as the emotion wells up. The lump in her throat must have looked like the kind of Adam's apple Chaz has had his heart set on for years. I Love Making Love To You (aka, Are You Listening Sonny?) is one more funky disco-lite MOR number for the road ("I want you to fill me with your soul ... I love when you give it to me" etc). Love Me gives little reason to. However, Cher's final plea "please love me" is one the lingers with an obvious pathos.


Cher decided to nip their marriage in the bud.
Far from the disgraceful embarrassment it has often been made out to be. It may have been more of an attempt to airbrush their relationship, but Cher did go on tour with him and do her best to keep him in check, so it certainly serves as an uncomfortable document in that regard. However, despite the title, the album isn't done through gritted teeth and sounds pretty relaxed and tuneful enough for what it is and nothing more. It is certainly an album of camp limitation, and one to seek out at the end of one's Cher discography discovery. Taking a short and sweet journey through folk-disco, mid-tempo MOR, and yes, more torch ballads, the songs all drip from the same tap. Cher's smooth, hollering contralto is balanced by Allman's mumbled gravel (and thankfully he is less nasal than Bono). The conflict of their love is non-existent here, and the 'tart with a heart' narrative songs are gone. One for mild curiosity, but far from the sore disappointment as if often stated.

6 comments:

dishy said...

Gordon:

It's ISLAND not ISLANDS!
Stop slamming Chaz
Love you

dishy said...

It's ISLAND not ISLANDS! BITCH!!!!

Diva Incarnate said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
dishy said...

Oh I understand that - but it's leaning a little too nasty. You have written some of the greatest Cher reviews of ALL TIME - and I find that amazing - because YOU ARE SO YOUNG! I remember hearing "Better Sit Down Kids" on the radio and STARS came out when I was a sophomore in high school - so I have been all there but you put the words in my mouth. You need to be doing this professionally.

Diva Incarnate said...

I've taken out one line from the Take Me Home piece.

Blogging, to me, is informal and gets to be irreverent. If I were to submit anything for publishing anywhere, of course I would filter it.

Please email me instead if you feel strongly about anymore content. Even if I disagree, it's still worth me knowing as obviously I love talking to Cher fans who don't just skim the hits :-)

dishy said...

Love you