Monday, 13 July 2009

We Are The Word, and You Are My Career

Nothing says 'I miss my dead brother, so leave me alone to grieve' more than a rush-release of a song recorded 7 years ago. Let's face it, a celebrity family in ruins had most of the poor ones poised to decide when they could tastefully sprint out the starting blocks and recieve the most me-me-media exposure using an emotive ballad, autobiography or job as 'E! News Live' correspondent.

And so it is LaToya who puts her pride aside by dedicating her 'new' single to the memory of Michael. In fairness, her vocals are dignified and (if a little maudlin) the song is eloquent and silly enough to make stupid people cry and feel sorry for her. She has the trademark frayed-tremble Jackson singing style, but also has a quality missing from, say, Janet's quiver. Most forum users are drowning in their own ejaculation mess to quickly accuse her of tasteless self-promotion, but this is the sort of thing Michael would have loved - she needs to shoot a video with him smiling down from the sky at her, sending down a CGI rainbow from his sequined glove for her to give him a hug before he vanishes, with a close-up confirming a well-timed tear treacling down.

Above: 'It was so many years ago' shows LaToya has every right to milk his death, no matter what anyone says; Only a face transplant could give her a better shot at a hit single - go for it Toy-Toy!

What I think Toy-Toy should have done was had a face-swap with her dead brother in order to selflessly fulfill his duties at the O2, and then sowe back her own face in time for the 2020 release of a new album.

Update: LaToya has already began a promotion campaign centered on her theory that her brother was murdered - MSN.COM got the ball rolling beautifully with the misleading headline link 'LaToya 'Murdered'' (I turned down my music and suddenly my heart started racing - I think that was a low blow from them indeed).

1 comment:

Mike said...

I am disgusted at this! How dare you suspect Toy Toy's motives as being anything other than entirely selfless!!! Outrageous!