Wednesday, 7 October 2009

Bisexual Skank Trance Volume 2

More likely to have a massive shit than a massive hit (unless her boyfriend gets really mad), Karren Parry's ambitious neice Skyla cranks up the skank higher than her New Look shoplifted mini-skirt, whilst trying to get a free taxi or kebab, for her second solo AATW release Ayo Technology and it is certainly up there with the labels' finest output. Already a Polish number one, she is quick to cover it and to misquote an AATW forum user, it is being bummed harder than Tina Cousins tying her shoe laces.

Liscensed with hard-boiled chav and Blue Wkd spurred 'romance' on the dancefloor, the song is more infectious than bareback sex in Africa, and unlike her GUM clinic visits her double-vadge-enda is perfectly clear as she g-spots some bitch in the club securing payment for her debts with dancefloor handy j's and full-on cunt teasing:

She work it girl she work the pole
She break it down she take it low
She fine as hell she about the dough
She doing her thing out on the floor

With her vocals soggier than her thrown out used tampons, the midget dance diva can't stop noticing 'she want it like a nympho / the info / I show you where to meet her' and soon finds her same-sex soul-mate as they compare abortion loyalty card rewards - Skyla's record contract came free after she got her 5th stamp in one month and only had to give a further 5 DJ's BJs to show them she was the real deal unlike auntie Karen who simply takes it from behind.

The Divine Inspiration-esque collateral damage is gorgeous, but Skyla's glaringly-faux lesbian pursuits are wonderfully desperate and verge on stunning were it not for the small matter of having no class:

When she ready to ride I´m ready to roll
I´ll be in this bitch till the club close
What should I do one thing on all fours
Now that that shit should be against the law

Her insatiable internal accomodation narrows her limits to just about nothing and compromises:

We can switch positions
From the couch to the counters in my kitchen

I am surprised this teenage trollop even bothers to take girls back to her flat, as I'm sure the bouncers at her favourite club have all had a go already and probably have posted it all on youtube anyway.

She wants it
she wants it
I got to give it to her
I got to give it to her

Eurgh, enough already - clearly this clit-crusader has never heard of a) black men, or b) the vegetable section at her local Lidl (it's the same difference depending on the quality of courgettes, just ask Jenny Frost - and why else do you think Tina Cousins is banned from ASDA?).

I never tire of the sheer ridiculousness of pimping this felch-face primadonna out as some kind of stunner - check out the guys clearly plucked from the nearest gym pretending to be into her for anything more than being seen in a music video:

Below: jealous camgirls cast as 'friends' and gym-fit straight boys make this very watchavable - ooh the angst of being a chav with feelings.

Living this dangerously does not come easy, even if she does cum easy if her twitter account is to be believed, and unless she dies of herpes, shame or a home visit from Kelly Llorenna, then I see no reason why there won't be more to come from this astoundingly tasteless trash diva princess.

1 comment:

Mike said...

How weird! Someone just send me an mp3 of this. It's atrocious but I love her. Although it's a risky choice because it's been covered 3 times in recent months. Surely the track is now completely over exposed?